Lovelygirl. Lovelygirl. Lovelygirl.
Will the stars align perfectly? Will fate nod in our favor? Will God Himself give this gift to me?
It is in His hands now.
The answer. Yes or no.
Lovelygirl's team, who cares more about her than anyone else has in her young life...they will convene. They will decide.
The conference call went very well. I felt a kinship with these ladies, this team...all rooting for lovelygirl. All hoping for that chance for her to find a good life. They care about her immensely, it was obvious.
I am shaking right now. I had to just answer honestly, be myselft, because in the end that is what will make an adoption work out. To find the best fit. I am not going to try and be a hero. I am just me. Humble. I will make mistakes, this I know. Learn from them.
Lessons learned. Past mistakes cause growth. I can see where I have changed, even in a year. My views have changed. For the better.
So, the timing wasn't right. To have our two paths connect, and join. A year ago, it wasn't right. Now it is.
Now, the timing seems right. It feels good. It feels right.
I want the best for Lovelygirl. I accept that which is best for her.
I keep envisioning her standing there, in a white dress, long hair blowing in the wind, her eyes upon me, and her little hand stretched out, palm up...waiting for someone to be there for her, unconditionally.
Oh God, let her waiting be over soon. Let her find her forever family. If it isn't us, then please God, help her. She deserves this so much. Help her shattered little heart.
Lovelygirl. Lovely girl. Lovelygirl.
Waiting. For the answer.
I think it's cool that you've gotten to a place of acceptance that her committee will decide what is best for Lovelygirl, and that you want that for her too. (You're a Lovelygirl too!) I'm curious, did you get much time to ask questions as well as to answer them? I mean, did you get enough info about her to have a good sense whether she would be a good fit for YOU?
ReplyDeleteWe talked for over an hour, but it is hard to know for sure if you get a complete picture or not. I feel like there won't be any surprises when/if we get to move on to the next level and read her complete file.
ReplyDeleteI do really feel like she would be a great fit for our family! A peace I guess? I do know that her team loves her! That is important!