pleased

I am so pleased!

Things are working out so well. Lovelygirl is a delightful, enchanting child. Though she is not without her issues, (only have had one accident thus far) her beauty and shining personality far outweigh those. She is a whole lot more than just her "issues." 

Today we decorated cookies, made fudge and also made and decorated a gingerbread house.

I look at her and think wow, she is such a beautiful child...how could those terrible things have happened to her? She deserves a chance to be loved and to thrive, and thankfully, now she has one.

About an hour ago, she was sitting on the arm of the chair I was seated in, all giggling and happy.  She "fell over" into my lap, and then snuggled right up on my lap.  She gave a tentative hug, and I hugged her right back. Then, without even realizing it, I was rocking her...and she stayed put and let me!

You can't even imagine the joy I felt when she let me rock her...and so I told her that since I didn't get to rock her when she was a baby, I could now...and then I sang to her..."Rock-a-bye baby..."  She giggled, and curled right up and let me. This pleases me to no end! She has missed so much in her life already, time to start making up for those missed milestones.

She still calls me by my first name, even though in foster homes it has only taken a day or so for her to start calling them "mom" she hasn't done that, and I am so proud of her for that!!!

This means that she knows the difference! When she is ready to really call me "mom" (if she does) she will mean it. 

She hasn't kissed me and has only given small hugs. (we did have one eskimo kiss...rubbing noses) But what a treasure those hugs are!


I start each day by telling her that "today is a new day" and we can make it whatever we want it to be.

I am staying pretty grounded and am actually very proud of myself as well.  I have managed to stay calm and consistent and making good eye contact and all those wonderful things that Dr. Karen Purvis talks about in her book, "The Connected Child" which I highly recomend you all to read at least 3 times!

Of course there will be tough times...many of them, I am sure. Already I know this...lovelygirl is worth it.

pleased.