patiencepatiencepatience

Sigh.
I am trying hard to be patient. I really am.
It's so hard to have no control over something so important. At least not in this part of the roller coaster ride.
No one said adoption would be easy.
I just thought it was going to be when I first started this procedure. I thought I would be the nontypical one, the one who found a child right away, and was approved.
I thought I might have a child by Christmas for sure!
Now?
Not so sure. Not so sure.
So, we sent in another homestudy. This time for a 6 yr old girl, whose name starts with a "D." Ohhhh so cute.
Funny how I can totally picture each of these possibilities in our home, in our family.
I can picture myself tucking in the two little ones, the asian sisters, reading to them, coloring with them, kissing them goodnight. Totally.
Yet, I can also picture listening to the new "A" play her violin, and having soulful talks with her, then running her down to a soccer game and cheering her on!
The same with little 6 yr old "D" she loves camping, fishing, and playing outside. She also loves coloring and dolls. I can picture her running around the yard, with our doggies, playing; and laying on the floor coloring pictures of fairies and horses.
Am I that fickle?
I like to think that I am remaining open.
Open to the possibilities that exist.
Not stuck on one girl, like I was before.
Good. I learned something. That's important.
Now to learn patience.
Patience, patience...and more patience.
As I wait.