Everyone tells you, when you begin the adoption process, that the ups and downs are hard, but the waiting is the hardest part of the whole journey.
So true.
Right after we found out we didn't get the two Asian siblings, I became pretty discouraged. I still took the advise of our adoption worker, and went on the AdoptUSKid website and sent our Home Study out on several girls. All are far away in different states, and all are older than 9 yrs old.
Then, through the OARE site, I did find two that are from Oregon, hooray! A 3 yr old and a 4 1/2 yr old. They aren't siblings so they are separate bulletins. I quickly sent in on them. They are both very cute and would fit in just great.
The age group we are looking at limits us. We really want to find on between the ages of 2 yrs and 10 yrs tops. Preferably under 8 yrs old. Our reasons are simple. We want to establish a good solid relationship with them BEFORE the tumultuous teenage years hit!
Since most girls in foster care have had some type of abuse, it seems to cause them to 'grow up' quickly, at least in that area. So most 9 yr old girls are going on 16 yrs old or more in the whole sexual department. Yikes!
I don't even want to get emotionally connected with either of these two girls. One of the workers at AFFEC, our agency, went through 5 failed committees before finally being selected for their little boy!
Even though we sent out on some out of state girls, we likely would not select them. Mainly because almost all kiddos have siblings and bio family who they want to remain in contact with. I can't really see us having to travel every year, sometimes twice a year, just to let them visit. That would mean no other family vacations anywhere else. I have dreams of taking them to Disneyland, and other family fun spots.
It wouldn't be fair to a child to take them too far away from their bio family, and so we will likely say no if we did get asked to committee.
Since there are so few GIRLS in our age range...we will be waiting a long time.
Time.
Getting older. Time could be running out. Will I see my dreams realized? OR be shut out because they consider us 'too old'????
Only time will tell.
